“Learn
to value yourself, and you will learn to value your time. Until you truly grasp
the worth of your time, you will not be able to utilise it. ”
A. Sumra
Everyone feel's low sometimes, that is life. However,
when the feelings do not go away and seem to be engrained into your belief
system then you know it is time to take action. It is important to understand,
accept and realise that when you are feeling low, depressed/ stressed, the ONLY person that can help YOU is YOURSELF. Looking after
number 1 and breaking the cycle is challenging but can be done if you make use
of your own personal strengths.
Things that we think, feel and do are all related to
each other. For example, if you think:
'I can't do anything right, everything I do
ends up wrong and does not work out'
Then the resulting action will affect your social
life and further bridge to your mental state (a feeling of isolation is most
common). This can then lead to physical symptoms like headaches, stabbing pains
etc. Feeling like you are not well and
cant accomplish anything is a negative thought so we are back to the first step
and the cycle continues. It is a cycle that can be hard to break and get out
of.
One way of managing low mood, making yourself feel
better and taking a step towards feeling happier is managing your self-esteem.
Low self-esteem is a major cause of feeling worthless and this can in turn
affect cortisol levels and can stunt your gains. This is because at times we have to put up
with pressures and expectations which leads to criticisms. For example 'look at how skinny you' or 'look
at how big you've got'. Most times you may be able to shrug off these comments,
but when you are feeling low in self-confidence and self-esteem such words can
have a major effect on how you feel and behave.
Self-esteem is about your own personal opinion of
yourself, having high self-esteem means having a good opinion of yourself. This is in no way arrogance or pride, it is a
healthy belief that you are a good person, fully capable, with the ability to
make your own decisions and like all humans you have your strengths and
weaknesses. Low self-esteem can start at
any time and can come from our background, upbringing, the media, and at times
even parents. A situation where you are
not praised for who you are, your achievements cannot encourage you to feel
happy about yourself. Negative self-esteem is maintained by how you react to
situations, the beliefs you have about yourself, how you interpret things and
what others have to say.
Your self esteem is not something that is concrete
and fixed, the way you feel about yourself can change in an instant and
remember everyone on this earth is different and special in their own way. When
you have a negative mood the only thoughts that crop up in our mind are
negatives ones. Take a second to re-evaluate the situation you are in an try
and see it in a different light.
There are ways to manage self-esteem and try to
build yours and here are some suggestions:
- Always give whatever you do your best
shot.
- Get to know yourself. Understand what you are good at and what your
weaknesses are so you can have realistic goals.
Don't be scared to try new things, this will help you learn more about
yourself.
- Learn not to be too hard on yourself and
reward yourself for when you do good. No
matter how small an achievement it is, make yourself feel good when you have
made an achievement.
- Be grateful for what you have - make a
list of all that you have in the world that you are grateful for from the
smallest pleasures such as clothes and a roof over your head, before you sleep
at night think about theses and it will make you realise how fortunate you are.
- Don’t be so hard on yourself – Know that
everyone has moments of weakness and makes mistakes. Learn to forgive your own
and see every situation as a new chance and opportunity where anything can
happen.
In short: in order to change anything about your
life you need to take action yourself, even a very small change will make a big
difference. Learn to accept who you are, there are some things in life which
cannot be changed, it is important for us to have the courage to change the
things we can, accept the things we cannot and the ability to know the
difference between the two.
If there are topics which you would like us to
discuss in the coming articles or if you have any questions about this article please
do let us know by emailing greatmindsgreatbodies@gmail.com